Due to the fact that I had to move to a new city within two weeks of accepting a job offer, I was in a mad rush for a roommate. Typically I would be able to rattle off a long list of various qualities that I needed an acceptable roommate/apartment to posses. But, in this great time of need, I required only a few: clean, cost efficient, location. I began my search where most people would look to buy tickets or an old sofa: Face book Marketplace. Naturally, this was not something that I take lightly, but I needed to be realistic. I came across Louise (name has been changed).
Louise is 29 and works as a counselor at a university. She has two tattoos. I don’t know if Louise knows that I actually know that she has two tattoos, but I know. I am not saying that she is trying to hide them from me, but we have yet to discuss the ink. I found out about this news shortly after I moved in. Louise was out of the apartment and I was about to start my first round snoop. I walked out of my bedroom and made the sharp right into her room. I decided to start with the closet. I firmly believe that you can tell a lot about someone by their closet. I noticed a number of things right off the bat. Her closet was about 30% full of clothes. They rest of the closet housed her cat’s litter box as well as a suitcase, and other average storage items. I continued into the bathroom and that is when her tattoos were revealed. I looked above her toilet and noticed two sepia colored framed photographs. They were both pictures of her back showcasing her tattoos below both of her shoulder blades. One tattoo is of a Chinese symbol and the other is a flower.
She is very quiet but very nice. Louise is single. She is ready to mingle. Although she is an attractive 29 year old, she cannot seem to meet someone. Actually, she does not have trouble meeting people, just the whole idea of getting them to commit to her. I know this because I have evidence of a houseguest.
About three months ago I woke up one morning and stumbled into my bathroom (My bathroom is also the hall bathroom which is also considered the guest bath). Right as I walked in, I noticed a clear plastic bag of toiletries. Now, a few things came to my mind. First, this was not even a “Zip Lock” bag it was the cheaper version that you have to press together and hope it actually stays locked. Second, among the typical toiletry items, the bag contained shaving cream and men’s deodorant. I immediately thought, “There is a man in this house”. I looked over towards Louise’s bedroom and her door was closed (she rarely closes her door) so I knew something was going on. I then left my bathroom and went back to my room only to return a few minutes later to notice the manly toiletry bag was missing. I left for work that morning without having a chance to interrogate Louise.
About three days later I decided to inquire about the mysterious toiletry bag. I calmly asked her “so, Louise did you have a house guest stay over recently?” She replied “yes, maybe”. Pushing for more information, I asked “Was this a friendly sleepover or a friendly sleepover?” She then explained that the recent visitor was a friend from college that lives in Texas. He was coming through town on business and needed a place to stay. I knew exactly was what going on at this point. I smiled, walked away back to my room and I guess my own business. I now refer to him as the “traveling cowboy”.
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